"I would do anything to make sure that whatever care she needs in the future (if she needs it) is the care that she wants and deserves.”
As part of our blog schedule to raise awareness of the Long Term Care Revolution National Challenge I was given the task of writing a blog for Mother’s day. There are quite a number of topics that could be highlighted by a blog of this kind, linking to Long Term care and the challenges ahead, for example:
- the importance of family in providing care and the challenges of living further apart.
- ageing without children, who looks after the 20-25% of people currently in their 40s that won’t have children to look after them when it comes to care? See the fantastic organisation Ageing Without Children www.awoc.org or @AWOCUK for more information.
- the difference between cultures in how families provide support.
As you can see there are quite a number of really critical issues that could be explored.
To help me to get started I went to my default option, I googled ‘intelligent quotes about Mother’s day’. There were loads. However the one that really leapt out at me wasn’t from Benjamin Franklin or Oscar Wilde or someone of great standing intellectually, but was from the Hallmark website:
“Sometimes you feel all grown up like you don’t need a Mummy… then you get the flu”.
It leapt out at me, because as in addition to all of the worldly quotations that were on there about the sanctity of motherhood, to me personally this is what it comes down to. No matter how grown up and sorted I feel, when the going really gets tough, it’s my Mum that I want. Whether it be a mad panic about how to be a Stepmother and how wrong I’m doing it, to just last week when I got hit by a tummy bug and rang my Mum for advice on whether or not I should risk getting the train to London when I felt like I was going to pass out at any minute. At the grand old age of 33, I know that this is ridiculous and that I am sensible enough (not sounding it at the moment!) to know what best to do, but sometimes you just want your Mum to tell you that what you are doing is right.
I feel so lucky to have the relationship with my Mum that I do. I know that this sounds extremely cheesy, but she really is the best Mum going. At 61, she is amazing. When she was 58 we ran the Birmingham half marathon together, she retired last year and went on to do the Women against Cancer 100km bike ride across London in the middle of the night, she is a wonderful Grandma to my niece and nephew, but best of all she is so much fun and (to the despair of my Dad and husband) we’ll often just be found giggling with a glass of wine.
So to get to the point, yes there are a lot of issues that could be quite sensibly linked to a Mother’s Day blog, but when it comes down to it I’m involved in the Long Term Care Revolution for very personal reasons and this then extends to my Mum. The thought of the future and my Mum getting old terrifies me, but one thing that I do know is that I would do anything to make sure that whatever care she needs in the future (if she needs it) is the care that she wants and deserves.
But despite all of my best intentions, what if I physically can’t do this. Questions immediately spring to mind are those such as:
“What will Mum need?”
“How much will it cost and will I be able to afford it?”
“Will I be able to make sure that she’s happy, fulfilled and, scary thought, will I be able to make sure she’s safe?”
That’s why I’m part of this project now, because if that time arrives I want to make sure that I did my part to make that future a good place to be. The challenges could be unbearably tough, but at least if the options are there to make it as simple as possible to choose the best way of doing things, that’s got to be a good thing.
If you are involved in any projects that you think can help to make our future choices better, please visit the Long Term Care Revolution website at https://connect.innovateuk.org/web/the-long-term-care-revolution/about-us to find out more about how you can get involved and forthcoming roadshows.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Jenni - Team Sandstorm